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Loving On Your Own Terms

February is coined as the month of love. Love has so many definitions. If you ask 100 people you would get 100 different definitions. No two people really look at it the same. We all long for different parts of love at different times. Love for me has changed so many times over my 38 years of life. I think that learning to love and accept love on your own terms makes it more powerful and more meaningful. This week we will explore 5 different ways to love on your own terms. I hope you enjoy!

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Monday: Your definition

How do you define love? Is it the queasy feeling you have when you see someone that’s special. Do you measure it by comparing it to what you have learned in church? Or maybe you relate it to what you witnessed between your parents or grandparents. Was that experience good or bad for you? How has it affected your definition?

Love is defined in the dictionary as an intense feeling of deep affection; a great interest and pleasure in something; or a deep romantic or sexual attachment to (someone). The urban dictionary defines it as ” the best thing that will ever happen to you.”

In my opinion, this is where all of our questions about love stem. Which definition is right? Which is wrong? Have you ever heard the saying “real love doesn’t hurt?” How do you feel about that? I’m sure many will disagree but unless they are defining hurt in the physical sense, I think it’s a damn lie. But, that’s only based on my life and my experiences and that’s why I know how important it is to define love for yourself.

There is only one way to truly love in your own terms. Forget every definition you have ever read, every love story you have ever watched, and every opinion you have ever heard and answer this question with boldness and certainty…Love is?

Gone are the days that we are able to answer my favorite question “Who Am I?”, based on the experiences and stories of others. No matter your age, at this point in your life, using only your life and experiences how do you define love?

What does it look like? What does it sound like? How does it feel? How do you measure it? What does it do for you? How does it define you? What do you know for sure about it? How has it affected your thoughts and actions?

HerStorians, answering these questions is your first step to loving on your own terms, don’t you dare hold back, this is your story.

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