I can remember when I first heard about the book, Are you there God? It’s Me, Margaret, by Judy Blume. It was a buzz about this book that followed a sixth-grade girl experiencing the many challenges of becoming an adolescent. There was one particular part in the book that everyone talked about… when she got her period. I was so excited that I was going to get to read firsthand about that experience. When I finally got my hands on the book, there was no need for me to flip through the pages to find the part because everyone had already turned the page down, so I did not have any problems finding it. I held my breath as I was reading. Omg, this is what I have to look forward to. This is how it’s going to happen for me when I get my period. I am going to be brave, just like her. I read those words over and over, hoping that they would come in handy when it was my turn. They didn’t. The book was the last thing on my mind by then. It had been so long since those words had penetrated my heart that the significance that it carried for me had faded away. I did not have the faith in her story to get me through it.
Even though this happened many moons ago, I noticed I still found myself searching for the faith story of someone else to get me through. It was easier for me to stop using my own and piggyback off of my sisters. I felt like I didn’t have the time or the strength to deal with my fleeting faith. But I had to. I was struggling.
So, I calmed down. I picked up a pen and paper and began to think about what the word faith meant to me. Not what someone told me or the definitions I read. I had to think back over my life and think about everything faith had been to me. The pages started to fill up…story after story, time after time, confirmation after confirmation. At that moment, I knew I had to redefine what faith was in my life now and what it would take for me to turn this struggle into strength.
I must believe. Everything seemed impossible. My thoughts lead with there is no way it would happen for me. I stopped believing.
I must see Jesus for myself! I was living on borrowed faith. My grandmothers Jesus…my aunts Jesus…my pastors Jesus…my social media Jesus…but not MY Jesus. I forgot about who HE is and HAS been to me.
I must trust him! This revelation is hard for me to admit. I feel so foolish that I have to remind myself of this. Who wouldn’t trust I AM?
I must hear, study, and perform HIS word! I will struggle without it. I will struggle without it. I will struggle without it.
I must continue to grow in faith! I am not God. I am not perfect. If I’m alive, I will continue to struggle. BUT my growing faith will sustain me.
These five steps worked for me but let me encourage you to grab your journal, think back over your life and redefine the power of the word faith for yourself. I pray that its power gets you all the way back together just like it did for me. Love you boo😘
Anyone else ever struggled with faith? How did you bounce back? Do you mind sharing your story with your sisters? Please leave your empowerment in the comments below.